Ugh….

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I hate Mother’s Day…

I have no Mom.  

It’s hard to wish my Mother in Law type person a Happy Mother’s Day cuz no matter how awesome and amazing she is she makes me miss my Mom even more.

I have no kids.  Not sure I even want one.  Jealous of all the Mom’s I went to high school with who have them already and wish each other Happy Mother’s Days.

I don’t speak to my grandmother.

The cats can’t even be bothered to pay attention to me today.

Sorry for being the “Debbie Downer” but there’s just no point for me.  No matter how well I’ve been doing with dealing with my Mom’s passing lately, Mother’s Day definitely doesn’t seem to have gotten any easier.  Everyone treats it like it’s a national holiday.  Why?  Soon people are going to demand a day off.  No one died or fought in a war or discovered a country or earned labor laws, etc, etc, etc……….  Yeah, people shot little people out of their vaginas and then put up with the brats for 18 years but we’re biologically made to do it so what’s the big deal?  Cats, dogs, opossums, and a ton of other mammals do it multiple babies at a time every time.  We don’t have Opossum Mother’s Day.  

I’ll probably delete this post eventually.  I’m just feeling down and cranky.  I don’t want apologies or “It always gets easier eventually”‘s or any of the other usual platitudes.  I’m tired of those.  It’s just a shitty day full of too many tears, fucked up heartbreak, lost favorite lipgloss, missing ushers, replacement ushers that do everything wrong, disconnected squirrel tails on the side of the road, headaches, and paperwork.

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2 responses »

  1. I don’t know if this will help, but someone posted this today on a Grief website I frequent:

    “If you know someone who has lost a child or lost anybody who’s important to them, and you’re afraid to mention them because you think you might make them sad by reminding them that they died, they didn’t forget they died. You’re not reminding them. What you’re reminding them of is that you remember that they lived, and that’s a great, great gift.” -Elizabeth Edwards

    Be gentle and kind today with both those who are grieving their mothers and those mothers who are grieving. And if you yourself are one or the other, be gentle and kind to yourself.

    I hope the sun is a little brighter for you (and me) tomorrow.

    • Thank you, Sherey. I’m sorry you were feeling sad yesterday too. That did help. I’ve been feeling so much better and I thought I would get through yesterday pretty easily, or at least easier than the last few years that I just wasn’t prepared. Is the sun brighter today for you?

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